


Beautiful Ingrate

by Latigra



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Date Night, Felix is Problematic, Felix's Incoherent Political Views, I thought Valentine's was tomorrow so this is rushed, M/M, Swords, Valentine's Day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-15
Updated: 2021-02-15
Packaged: 2021-03-16 11:26:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,419
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29453019
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Latigra/pseuds/Latigra
Summary: It's Dimitri's first Valentine's Day with a significant other, and he's determined to make it nice. Even if Felix is above it all.
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Felix Hugo Fraldarius
Comments: 6
Kudos: 16





	Beautiful Ingrate

**Author's Note:**

> So, this probably is full of typos since I wanted to get it out on Valentine's Day.
> 
> I do not endorse any of the shitty things that Felix says.
> 
> Also, I'll check it for typos and stuff later.

"Valentine's Day is not a real holiday," Felix says, turning up his nose. "It's nothing more than bourgeois propaganda designed to sell corporatized, empty greeting cards masquerading as sanitized illusions of sexuality and love."

A pause.

"Right," says Dimitri. He would not be Felix's friend (much less his boyfriend) if he didn't know how to take certain things in stride. "Of course."

Felix's eyes narrow suspiciously.

"And I don't want to facilitate the exploitation of. . . Hallmark card designers," tries Dimitri.

"No, you dolt!" says Felix. "You don't want to exploit waiters! Or add to the consumerist waste destroying the planet. Or-"

"Right," Dimitri says quickly, raising his hands in a placating lecture. "But Felix, it's my first Valentine's Day with a . . . uh, significant other, and I was hoping we could do something special."

Felix's pale cheeks blossom red like roses in spring, and he can't maintain eye contact. Which means Dimitri has a short window to convince him to do something cheesy and beneath him that he secretly wants to do.

"And it doesn't have to be an empty capitalist symbol or anything like that," Dimitri says. "We can stay in my apartment and make dinner and watch a-” Dimitri almost says _romantic comedy_ "documentary about the labor movement! Or anything you want. I just really want to spend the night with you."

When Felix makes an annoyed sound and half turns away, Dimitri knows that he's won.

That being said, he would rather have Felix with him the whole of Valentine's night. Which means not getting carried away with glitter, flowers, and chocolate, or Felix will storm out in the middle of a February blizzard without his coat on. Felix doesn't like sweets to begin with. It'll be challenging to stay on theme and keep him happy.

After deliberating on it for hours, Dimitri decides to cook Felix's favorite meal - Daphnel stew. He tries a few evenings ahead of time for practice, and of course, he fails. Dimitri can't even taste most foods, has to put on alarm on his phone to maintain an appropriate caloric intake for lacrosse season. Left to his own devices, he'll cook something awful, and Felix will take it as mockery and break up with him.

So he asks Dedue for help.

It takes some convincing.

"Dedue," says Dimitri, "I know you and Felix don't really get along."

"I already said yes," says Dedue, broad shoulders relaxed.

Yes, but Dimitri can tell that, deep down, Dedue would rather not assist with his. . . with the relationship.

"Felix is. . ."

"A dick," finishes Dedue.

Dimitri winces, but that's a somewhat accurate, if unkind, assessment.

"But he makes you happy," adds Dedue, giving Dimitri a soft look. "I'll make the best Daphnel stew this side of the continent, but I take no responsibility if Felix throws it in your face."

"Thank you!" Dimitri beams. "I promise I'll keep your involvement a secret."

In the meantime, Dimitri researches the best documentary for them to watch. It needs to be about an important subject, preferably challenging, but not so sad that Felix will spend the evening incensed. Well, more so than usual. Perhaps a history documentary? He’s an avid fencer, so perhaps a documentary about the history of the sport? That couldn’t possibly offend Felix, right? Honestly, anything could offend Felix. If Dimitri allows himself to dwell on that, he would never settle on a film. He watches the first few minutes of a sword-related documentary on Netflix, finds it extremely dull, and then decides that he’ll hopefully be kissing Felix all evening anyway.

Then he blushes, and moves on to selecting an outfit.

Dimitri’s fashion sense leaves much to be desired, but he figures that anything blue will make his eyes stand out. He has been told by many that his eyes are his best features. And the width of his shoulders, especially in comparison with his narrow waist. Although, Felix calls him a disproportionate Neandearthal, so perhaps he should not accentuate his figure too much. That also threw him off because all his shirts tended to be tight at the shoulders and loose at the waist, but going for a light blue undershirt would leave his beastly arm muscles bare. The loose blue shirt would have to do.

Finally, the hardest part of the evening. What gift would Felix _not_ reject as sentimental foolishness?

Cards are of course out. Even personalized ones. Chocolates? Felix hates all types of candy. Or he pretends to, at least. Dimitri wouldn’t be surprised if Felix had cheap candy hidden in his dorm room. Flowers? Dimitri shudders to think of the environmentally-conscious rant _that_ would trigger. Normally, Dimitri avoids abusing his family’s wealth, but he can only think of one thing that wouldn’t make Felix flee his apartment after beating him to death. A sword.

Not just any type of sword - an authentic fencing sword. Whatever that means. Something that would be allowed in official competitions. Dimitri has a mere week before Valentine’s Day. It takes some searching online, and talking to a strange lady over the phone who asks for a truly exorbitant amount of money, but Dimitri gets an earnest promise to have the sword ready the night before Valentine’s Day. Since he’s already pulling all the stops, Dimitri asks if there’s an option to put jewels on the hilt. There is, but Dimitri will never admit to the cost. Felix might stab him with the sword.

“I hope you’re not expecting me to join this foolishness and get your _presents_ ,” Felix warns him, as their classmates start decorating Garreg Mac with flowers and hearts.

“Of course not, Felix,” Dimitri says, stroking his cheek.

Felix scoffs, then stands on the tips of his toes to kiss Dimitri’s chin. Then Dorothea whistles at them and Felix goes as red as the most ripe tomato, and pushes Dimitri off. Dimitri laughs, then grabs his hand and pulls him to their next class.

The sword arrives the night before Valentine’s, just as the lady promised. The rubies embedded on the hilt glint against the light of Dimitri’s lamp, much like Felix’s wine-colored eyes glinted with anger at any random point during the day. Just from lifting it, Dimitri can tell that Felix would be beside himself with happiness. Which is to say, he probably would only insult the gift once or twice.

Dimitri’s phone interrupts his musing. Carefully, he places the sword back in its box and answers.

“I hope you haven’t taken Felix’s anti-Valentine rants seriously,” Sylvain says, without preamble.

“No!” says Dimitri. “I mean, of course I have. My plans for tomorrow are completely personalized and not helping with the. . . commercialization of love and sex.”

“Oh geez,” says Sylvain. “But you have _something_ planned, right?”

“Yes,” says Dimitri. “Dinner, a documentary about swords, and a gift. Not Valentine’s themed!”

“Good, good,” says Sylvain. “Felix just spent the last ten minutes pontificating about how you better not have done anything stupid for tomorrow night, which basically he means he’ll be crushed if you don’t go all out.”

“I really don’t think Felix is that insincere,” says Dimitri.

“My point is that I’m pretty sure you could pop Felix’s ass cherry tomorrow.”

“ _Sylvain!_ ” Dimitri’s deeply grateful that there’s no one in the room to see him blush so hard that his cheeks burn off.

“Only you can save us, Dimitri,” says Sylvain. “If you lay Felix right, he might finally stop shitting on everyone’s parade. Seriously. I have never encountered anyone who needs to get railed as desperately as Felix Hugo Fraldarius.”

Dimitri hangs up the phone, and then does pull ups until he forgets the whole thing. He’s not _planning_ to do anything with Felix, though he hopes - only if Felix wants to! He won’t pressure Felix into anything. As if he could! Felix would bite his head off.

The jitters don’t leave Dimitri, so he should be grateful that Valentine’s day falls on a Sunday. He should be even more thankful that Dedue is a saint who agrees to come to his apartment to prepare the stew even though he has his own Valentine’s date to prepare.

“I promise you, Dimitri,” Deduce says, while Dimitri frets. “Felix is not worth all this angst. The way he talks to you is unconscionable.”

“He’s just a little prickly,” says Dimitri.

“He has the personality of a hand grenade,” says Dedue.

The worst part is that Felix would probably be flattered by that comparison. Dimitri might just pretend he came up with it, and tell it to him as a compliment. “You mind if I use that?”

“I have no words,” says Dedue, as he sets the stove on the lowest setting. “Don’t forget to turn off the stove after you two eat.”

Dimitri thanks him profusely at the door, promises to pay him back with anything Dedue might need for the next ten years. For the rest of their lives! Deduce tells him not to worry, and to kick Felix out if he gets too unbearable, and Dimitri can only nod noncommittally. He spends the rest of the evening pacing, checking on the stew, until Felix texts him to announce that he’s at the door. Dimitri’s heart gallops in his chest, and somehow accelerates when he finds Felix glaring at him.

“Hi,” says Dimitri, by way of greeting. “Sorry about my shirt.”

“What?”

“I mean, come in!” Dimitri steps to the side, then realizes that he should try to kiss Felix - maybe? But Felix straides in as Dimitri bends down.

“Smells nice,” says Felix, as he takes off his heavy winter jacket. “Did you actually cook?”

“No, D-I paid a chef!” says Dimitri. “And I gave an extra nice tip, of course, so it’s not exploitative.”

“Right, right,” says Felix, waving a hand. “What are we watching?”

Dimitri looks at him, noting for the first time that Felix is wearing a nice, wine-colored shirt that brings out his unusual eyes. His hair is up in a ponytail and if Dimitri did not know better, he would swear that Felix is wearing eyeliner. And something that makes his eyelashes look fuller.

“What are you looking at?” demands Felix.

“Nothing,” says Dimitri. “You look nice, but not too nice, like you’re trying or anything.”

“Are you going to be like this all evening? Asks Felix. “Because I will leave.”

“No, no,” says Dimitri. “Let me just set up the documentary, and then we can eat and it’ll be just like any regular night.”

Thankfully, Felix seems absorbed by the voice droning on about different types of metals. He stops only to grudgingly compliment the chef, then fixes his gaze on the screen, leaving Dimitri to try and figure out how to inch closer to him. They’ve been together long enough that Dimitri no longer feels awkward reaching for him, though Felix is prone to pushing him off randomly like an angry cat, but tonight is a special night. Try as he might, Dimitri can’t forget his inappropriate conversation with Sylvain. Is it possible that Felix would let him - no, that Felix _expects_ him to. . . take their physical relationship to the next level?

After Felix is done with the stew, Dimitri is sitting close enough that he can put his arm around Felix without having to contort his body into an unnatural shape. Felix freezes, but then he settles on Dimitri’s chest before Dimitri can jump back and apologize profusely for overstepping. The documentary narrator drones on about temperature that forges the best type of sword.

“So I got you a present,” says Dimitri. “Not like a traditional Valentine’s day present, obviously.”

“Ah, I got you a present too,” admits Felix. “Just because I know how silly you are about this sort of thing.”

“Oh.” Dimitri feels his heart swell like a cartoon. He can’t resist an urge to hug Felix tighter and kiss his forehead. After the expected moment of tenseness, Felix looks up and pulls Dimitri down for a proper kiss, with tongue and everything. Reluctantly, Dimitri pulls back. “Okay,” he says, wheezing. “Let me just - get your gift.”

He thinks, as he presents the plain, long box to Felix, that he should have wrapped it in some type of non-Valentine’s wrapping paper. The box looks sad and sloppy, and Felix regards it with deep suspicion, shoots Dimitri a warning look, and then opens it.

“Wow,” he says, hesitantly reaching out to stroke the jeweled hilt.

“It’s a lot, I know,” says Dimitri. “But it’s completely authentic, made by an expert, and sourced from like, non-conflict metals and rubies. This is a vegan sword!”

Felix picks up the sword while Dimitri babbles, eyes wide. He slashes at the air, sighing at how it feels, and Dimitri relaxes. Felix likes the gifts enough that he’s not even insulting it yet, much less asking about the particulars.

“My gift is not this cool,” says Felix, avoiding Dimitri’s eyes.

“It’s okay,” says Dimitri. “It’s enough that you’re here.”

“Ugh, I hate you,” says Felix. “Get my coat.”

Beaming, Dimitri heads to the coat closet. Even if nothing happens all evening, it’s been a success. Felix says he hates Dimitri, his version of “I love you”. Dimitri feels his smiles growing bigger as he hands Felix the coat, though Felix just glares harder.

“I don’t want you to make a big deal out of this,” Felix warns, as he aggressively searches his coat pockets. “I only got these because Sylvain I should _consider your feelings_ , ugh.” Without looking at Dimitri in the eyes, he shoves a little box at Dimitri’s hand.

Gently, Dimitri looks down. It’s a little ring box, the same color as Dimitri’s hand. With a gasp, Dimitri opens the little box. Inside, there are two elegant bands with tiny blue and red gemstones.

“They’re not engagement rings or anything,” says Felix. “Don’t get ahead of yourself, we’re too young to be considering that. _But_ you’re probably the type to like stupid things like promise rings and I might not even wear it, okay?”

“I love it!” says Dimitri, forgetting to be restrained. He pulls Felix into a hug and lifts him straight off the floor, ignoring his indignant protests. “I love you.”

“Ugh,” says Felix. “I love you too. This is a horrible holiday.”

“This is the _best_ holiday,” says Dimitri, gently slipping a ring onto Felix’s finger. “I want to spend the next hundred Valentine’s days with you.”

“Me too,” says Felix, blushing. He takes the other rings and slips it on Dimitri’s finger.

**Author's Note:**

> My [twitter account!](https://twitter.com/LaTigra46636273)


End file.
